12/25/09 Blog 2

Merry Christmas, everybody! (or in the dialog of my dad, Happy Holidays!) The previous night was terrible. My parents lounged with me in the master bedroom until an "adult" movie came on. Not only did they send me out to the den, but after a while of my coming back for a bunch of random reasons, they locked the door. So, today, I woke up once, and I intently waited for the anticipation rush to smack me in the face. Nothing came. I was actually tired! But hey, I dropped like a rock in my bed after I made sure the cookies and milk was set out, (or is it milk and cookies?), the presents were all in place so if my parents decided to take one back, I'd notice, and that my holiday spirit was intact.
Well, actually, I had had a nasty case of the hiccups over nine times that day. Not the "oopsie and then giggle" type, but more like the "rabid animal with asthma" type. So, I hadn't gotten to sleep as much as I unwillingly wanted to until I had held my breath like a hundred times.
Today was the big day! After I got up and checked my hair status with my hand, I found that my night cap had completely fallen off. But who could blame it? It's elastic is about as stretched out as my lips when I fake smile for my mom's friends that I don't even know who claim that I've "grown so much". But anyway, I had gotten a little hot during the night, so...I'd taken my new pj pants off. (we have a tradition where we get new pj's to wear on Christmas Eve) But now, I was cold, so I slipped them back on along with my knitted Rocket Dog boots, but then took them off, not wanting to disturb my parents sleeping downstairs. I looked over to the living room to see if Santa had paid me a visit, only to see he had devoured two out of three of our late-baked sugar cookies, and gulped down the milk and left me no presents. Dang old fat dude.
I put my shoes back on and headed to the master bedroom to go get my parents, but only found my mom.
Long story short, I called my dad, who eventually showed up and sat down for what seemed like two hours before he grabbed his camera and we headed to the tree. But stop everything. Mom was upstairs brushing her teeth, so I sat down and picked what I'd open first. After she came down, the wrapping flew. I opened a lot of things, some of which I didn't really favor.
FAVORED: Avatar for wii, the Sims 3, Night At the Museum 2, My Sims Kingdom for wii, My Sims Agents for wii, iTunes gift card, net-book (talking to you on right now) and Wii Fit.
NOT FAVORED: Spa Pedicure Set (which will NOT be used even though I don't want to be rude), heavy blue jacket which I thought was a sleeping bag, and I think that's it.
I haven't opened ALL my presents, and we've got guests near four, so have a great time during whatever holiday you celebrate! I hope I do.

12/24/09 Blog 1

It's Jorden,and boy, it's raining cats and dogs out here. Not only are we stranded out in the cold and windy, but my nose is running like a freaking waterfall. Since we had no tissues, I was forced to head over to the napkin dispenser in the packed Costco warehouse to grab three scratchy napkins to substitute for the soft tissues my pug nose oh-so desired. Now, we're driving in our sandy-colored Lincoln Navigator to drop off these dang mixed fruit cups at my grandma's place. Come to think of it, this is all her fault. We do this about every two weekends if not every weekend. Do what, you may ask? Go to Costco's to buy this crappy fruit. Seriously, couldn't she cut some fruit up at home, put them in individual little cups, and cover them with some plastic wrap? You know what? It might not really be her fault I was soaking wet, getting my new hair-do wet, and drowning in my own mucous. It was my mom. First of all, why can't we go buy the fruit later, and mail it to her? It's the Christmas season; everything is getting mailed. Secondly, she was the one who forced me to go to that terrible place she calls the "beauty shop". I call it total HELL. It sure feels like it, anyway. The burns, the gallons of grease sitting upon my head at the same time, making the burns even more severe, and the feeling of being deep fried in peanut oil seem like a close reality. Anyway, now it's raining, and all that wasted pain and money just trickles down the drain with the rest of the rain.

Later on, I'm not surprised to find my nose still dripping, but now I am exhausted. Christmas Eve in Memphis. This year, totally rained out. I keep reminiscing back on the corny comparison the d.j. made over two times on the radio today every time he played "White Christmas", (repetitively, by the way), saying "More like we'll be having a wet Christmas", which, like I said, is incredibly corny.

It's not much to say, but, Happy Holidays! My dad's been fussing at the multiple news anchors for saying "merry Christmas" and being biased towards the many holidays coming around during this season. I'm normally con-correspondence, but tomorrow's Christmas, so what the hay. I'll listen this once. Just this once.